Mastering Keigo — Respectful, Humble, and Polite Japanese

• Introduction
• The Three Kinds of Keigo
• Respectful Language — Elevating the Other
  • 1. Special Respectful Verbs (Most Important)
  • 2. The "o + masu-stem + ni naru" Pattern
  • 3. The Passive-Looking "reru/rareru"
• Humble Language — Lowering Yourself
  • 1. Special Humble Verbs
  • 2. The "o + masu-stem + suru" Pattern
  • The Key to Using Humble Language: The Subject Is Me
• Polite Language — Making the Sentence Polite
  • Beautifying Language (Words with o/go)
• Distinguishing o and go
  • Caution: Do Not Attach to Loanwords or Nature
• The Two Kinds of Humble Language (Advanced)
• Practical Business Expressions
  • The Uchi/Soto (Inside/Outside) Principle
• The Pitfall of Over-Honorification
  • Double Keigo
  • Manual Keigo (Excessive Politeness)
• Comparison with Korean Honorifics
• Comprehensive Table of Three-Way Keigo for Key Verbs
• In Practice: Email and Phone
  • Email Opening and Closing
  • Phone Handling
• Suggested Learning Order
• Self-Check for Respectful/Humble Confusion
• Conclusion
• References

Introduction

Even people who have studied Japanese for a while lose confidence in front of keigo (敬語, honorific language). Korean speakers, who have a highly developed honorific system of their own, still find Japanese keigo tough. It overlaps with Korean honorifics in places, but there are decisive differences.

The biggest difference is "who is being elevated, relative to whom." Korean mainly elevates the "person you speak to" and the "person spoken about," but Japanese keigo adds a distinctive system of humble language that elevates the listener by lowering yourself. There is also the "uchi/soto (inside/outside)" concept: when talking to someone outside your company about your own boss, you do not use honorifics for that boss.

This guide organizes Japanese keigo as a grammatical system. We cover:

1. The three kinds of keigo — the concepts and differences of respectful, humble, and polite language
2. The rules and special forms for building each kind
3. A table of special honorific forms for key verbs
4. How to use the o/go prefixes
5. Practical business expressions
6. The pitfall of over-honorification (double keigo)
7. Comparison with Korean honorifics

Keigo is not mere etiquette but a precise device for expressing human relationships through language. Understanding the rules actually makes it clearer.

The Three Kinds of Keigo

Japanese keigo divides broadly into three. Recently, some split polite language into "polite" and "beautifying" language for a five-way classification, but the following three-way split is practical for learning.

The core principle, drawn as a diagram:

         [the other / superior]
              ▲
   respectful │        raises the other's action upward
   (iku → irassharu)
              │
         [speaker / me]────▶ polite (desu/masu) toward the listener
              │
   humble     ▼        lowers my own action downward
   (iku → mairu)

For the same action "go (iku)": if the other person goes, it is the respectful irassharu; if I go, it is the humble mairu; and simply politely it is ikimasu. In other words, who performs the action determines which kind of keigo you use.

Respectful Language — Elevating the Other

Respectful language elevates the action or state of the other party or a superior in the topic. There are three ways to form it.

1. Special Respectful Verbs (Most Important)

Some core verbs have dedicated respectful forms. Memorizing these first is efficient.

iku/kuru/iru → irassharu
taberu/nomu  → meshiagaru
iu           → ossharu
miru         → goran ni naru
suru         → nasaru
kureru       → kudasaru
shitte iru   → gozonji da

sensei wa ashita irasshaimasu ka.
(Will the teacher come tomorrow?)
shachou ga sou osshaimashita.
(The president said so.)

2. The "o + masu-stem + ni naru" Pattern

Verbs without a special form use this pattern to become respectful.

yomu  → o-yomi ni naru    (reads, honorific)
kaku  → o-kaki ni naru    (writes, honorific)
matsu → o-machi ni naru   (waits, honorific)

3. The Passive-Looking "reru/rareru"

A respectful expression with the same shape as the passive. It is a somewhat lighter respect, used in less formal settings.

yomu → yomareru   (reads, honorific)
kuru → korareru   (comes, honorific)

The degree of respect roughly ranks in the order: special form, then oni naru, then reru/rareru. In formal settings, prefer special forms and oni naru.

Humble Language — Lowering Yourself

Humble language lowers the action of yourself or your own side (uchi), thereby elevating the other. Since this concept does not exist in Korean, learners find it the hardest.

1. Special Humble Verbs

iku/kuru   → mairu / ukagau
iru        → oru
taberu/nomu → itadaku
iu         → mousu / moushiageru
miru       → haiken suru
suru       → itasu
morau      → itadaku
ageru      → sashiageru
kiku/tazuneru → ukagau
au         → ome ni kakaru
shitte iru → zonjite orimasu

watashi ga go-annai itashimasu.
(I will guide you.)
ashita 3-ji ni ukagaimasu.
(I will visit you at 3 tomorrow.)
shiryou o haiken shimashita.
(I saw the document. → lowers my act of viewing)

2. The "o + masu-stem + suru" Pattern

When there is no special form, use this pattern to be humble.

motsu → o-mochi suru    (carry for you)
okuru → o-okuri suru    (send for you)
matsu → o-machi suru    (will wait)

o-nimotsu o o-mochi shimasu.
(I will carry your luggage.)

The Key to Using Humble Language: The Subject Is Me

The key to not confusing respectful and humble language is "who is the subject of the action."

the other looks  → goran ni naru (respectful)
I look           → haiken suru   (humble)

the other comes  → irassharu     (respectful)
I go             → mairu/ukagau  (humble)

Polite Language — Making the Sentence Polite

Polite language does not elevate a specific person; it shows a polite attitude toward the listener. The desu/masu style is its representative.

gakusei da    → gakusei desu
iku           → ikimasu
aru           → arimasu → gozaimasu (more polite)

gozaimasu is the polite form of arimasu, used especially in customer service and business.

uketsuke wa 2-kai ni gozaimasu.
(The reception is on the second floor.)

Beautifying Language (Words with o/go)

A subcategory of polite language, attaching o/go to objects to make speech more refined is called beautifying language. It does not directly elevate the other but refines the speaker's manner of speech.

o-cha (tea)   o-mizu (water)   go-han (rice)   o-kane (money)

Distinguishing o and go

The prefixes o and go are used across respectful, humble, and beautifying language. The principles:

There are many exceptions, though: some Sino-Japanese words conventionally take o.

o-denwa  o-shokuji  o-jikan  o-ryouri  o-yakusoku
(Sino-Japanese words, but conventionally take o)

Caution: Do Not Attach to Loanwords or Nature

X o-koohii  X o-biiru (though conventionally used in service settings)
X o-sora  X o-yama (generally)

As a rule, do not attach o/go to loanwords. Also, do not attach them to your own items or things that should be lowered.

The Two Kinds of Humble Language (Advanced)

The Agency for Cultural Affairs guidelines divide humble language into two kinds. You need not know this early on, but it is worth knowing for accurate use at the intermediate level and beyond.

Seen through examples, the difference is:

sensei no tokoro ni ukagaimasu. (I will visit the teacher's place.)
  → there is a target faced (the teacher) → Humble I

densha de mairimasu.            (I will go by train.)
  → lowers oneself even without a specific target → Humble II

ukagau cares about "toward whom" you go, while mairu simply states your own movement courteously. Knowing this distinction lets you understand the nuance difference between torihikisaki ni ukagau (visit a client, O) and eki ni mairu (go to the station, O).

Practical Business Expressions

The keigo expressions used especially often in the workplace.

The Uchi/Soto (Inside/Outside) Principle

The most important practical concept in Japanese keigo. When talking to someone outside your company (soto) about someone inside your company (uchi), you do not use honorifics for that person, no matter how senior.

Inside the company, to your boss:
  buchou wa ima irasshaimasu ka. (Is the manager here now? → respectful OK)

To a client, referring to your own manager:
  buchou no Tanaka wa seki o hazushite orimasu.
  (Manager Tanaka is away from his desk → no honorific title, use humble)

In front of a client, you call your own boss by name only ("Tanaka wa") and lower them with humble language (orimasu). This uchi/soto sense differs greatly from Korean honorifics.

The Pitfall of Over-Honorification

Trying to use keigo precisely often produces errors. The classic is double keigo (二重敬語).

Double Keigo

The error of stacking two respectful elements on one verb.

X o-yomi ni narareru  → "o~ni naru" + "reru" doubled
O o-yomi ni naru

X goran ni narareru   → "goran ni naru" + "reru" doubled
O goran ni naru

X ossharareru         → "ossharu" + "reru" doubled
O ossharu

Special respectful verbs (ossharu, irassharu) are already respectful in themselves, so adding reru/rareru on top makes double keigo.

Manual Keigo (Excessive Politeness)

Expressions conventionally used in service settings but grammatically debated.

? kochira ga menyuu ni narimasu. (Here is the menu → misuse of narimasu)
O kochira ga menyuu de gozaimasu.

? 1000-en kara o-azukari shimasu. (kara is unnecessary)
O 1000-en o-azukari shimasu.

These are widely used in the field, but it is best to avoid them in formal settings or documents.

Comparison with Korean Honorifics

Two differences stand out.

First, Korean is close to absolute honorifics. A boss is always a boss, so even to outsiders you elevate them ("the manager, honorifically"). Japanese, by contrast, uses relative honorifics, so you lower your own manager in front of a client.

Second, Japanese humble language is far more systematic and essential than Korean's. Korean does have humble expressions (deurida, yeojjupda, boepda), but Japanese has a humble form for nearly every action, used as a must in business.

Comprehensive Table of Three-Way Keigo for Key Verbs

A single table of [plain / respectful / humble] for the most frequently used verbs. Memorizing this table as sets is the shortcut to learning keigo.

A key feature: irassharu serves as the respectful form of three verbs — iku, kuru, and iru. You judge which meaning applies from context.

In Practice: Email and Phone

Keigo especially shows its polish in documents and on the phone. Let us organize the frequently used set expressions.

Email Opening and Closing

osewa ni natte orimasu.
(Thank you for your continued support -> the standard business-email greeting)

go-kakunin no hodo, yoroshiku onegai itashimasu.
(I kindly ask for your confirmation.)

o-isogashii tokoro kyoushuku desu ga,
(I am sorry to trouble you while you are busy, but ...)

Phone Handling

tadaima, seki o hazushite orimasu.
(He is away from his desk right now -> oru is the humble of iru)

shoushou o-machi itadakemasu deshou ka.
(Could you please wait a moment?)

o-denwa arigatou gozaimasu.
(Thank you for your call.)

Memorizing such expressions whole lets you use them immediately in practice. For keigo, it is effective to combine understanding the rules with memorizing set phrases.

Suggested Learning Order

1. Polite language (desu/masu): the base of all keigo. Master it fully first.
2. Special respectful and humble verbs: start with core pairs like irassharu/mairu.
3. oni naru / osuru patterns: rule-based generation.
4. o/go prefixes: the kun/on-reading principle.
5. Uchi/soto: an essential business sense.
6. Avoiding double keigo: trimming the excess.

It is especially efficient to memorize the set of [plain / respectful / humble] for a single verb like "iku."

iku : ikimasu / irassharu / mairu, ukagau
iu  : iimasu  / ossharu   / mousu, moushiageru
miru: mimasu  / goran ni naru / haiken suru

Self-Check for Respectful/Humble Confusion

Finally, let us organize the respectful/humble confusions learners make most often into a checklist. If you can explain to yourself why each wrong sentence on the left is incorrect, you have grasped the keigo sense.

The core test is always "who performs this action." If I do it, use humble language (haiken, itadaku, itasu); if the other does it, use respectful language (goran ni naru, meshiagaru, nasaru).

Conclusion

Keigo is the ultimate hurdle in Japanese and, at the same time, the key to earning trust in Japanese society. The rules look complex, but if you grasp the three axes — "whose action, in which direction" — the other's action goes up (respectful), my action goes down (humble), and the whole sentence stays polite (polite) — you can handle most situations.

Aiming for perfection from the start only makes you tense up. Realistically, first nail polite language, memorize about ten frequently used special keigo verbs as sets, and refine gradually through practice. Since even native speakers often slip into double keigo, a caring attitude toward the other matters more than excessive perfectionism.

References

• Agency for Cultural Affairs "Guidelines on Keigo"
• JLPT Official Site
• goo Dictionary - Japanese dictionary
• NHK Broadcasting Culture Research Institute - Language
• Tofugu - Japanese Keigo
• Imabi - Keigo